Dear Mama,

This past week has been pretty crazy. As I was discussing it with one of my friends just now it totally all hit me, how symbolic it all is. So I went from running around like crazy, completely mentally and emotionally prepared to leave for Kuwait. Then found out, abruptly that I will not be leaving, at least not any time soon. Immediately a cold sore formed on my mouth. I was very much looking forward to the extra money I was going to be having. So then I started looking into going back to school. Deep down I feel a little bit panicky because I feel like I cant be living with grandma too much longer. I know I need to move on, but I have no idea how I can do so. So then thursday morning I woke up to not be able to move! My lower back had completely given out and I could not even sit up or get out of bed. Gradually it got better, after a couple days of precaution, chiropractor, and pain meds. Still it is tight and sore but thank God it is nothing like it was initially. So then today as I was leaving for work, I happened to look at my tire and saw that the metal wires were showing, and the left front tire looked super low. I panicked and had a terrible feeling. So I took it in, and had to replace my two front tires. Then discussing it with my friend right now, I realized I simply cannot move forward! In all aspects of my life. I want to and feel I am trying but one thing after another seems to be stunting me. My body, my transpiration, my education, my finances, a new job. I cant help but be baffled. I really want to change and better myself, and am trying to find ways to do so. God knows best.